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January 2, 2015

A New Rich Mullins' Song

We spent the eve of the new year with Jenna & Pascal playing a few games of Carcassonne, finishing off left-over Christmas cookies, and enjoying a few brews from what is becoming our annual brother beer exchange. As midnight neared, I visited my computer to flip the album, as it were, and find some new tunes to usher in the new year. Among the files that survived our recent digital disaster, was the album Songs from Rich Mullins. Yes, that’ll do just fine – more than fine.

There is a good deal of music that I’ve not listened to in a long time, but that doesn’t mean it has lost its power. The voice and lyrics of Rich Mullins pierce me every time it finds my ear. And, with him freshly on my mind, I did some small searching yesterday and happened upon this song (which I had never heard), performed only two weeks before his death. I encourage you to also visit the YouTube page and read the story found in the description.

If you’re not familiar with Rich Mullins, I strongly encourage you to look him up. You are missing out if you don’t. Andrew Peterson has some great words regarding Rich, with which I resonate well.

This video also challenges me to live each moment this year. It is in the now that we will glimpse eternity. Keep your heart attentive, for we can’t know what chance encounters await this year.

January 1, 2015

Adventures Await

Is it not true that a new year so often holds such promise? Even were I to live a thousand years, I think there is something about newness – it never gets old. As we peer out upon an untrod path, stretching into the unknowns beyond a distant horizon, we wonder and we hope. Oh, what adventures await? Oh, what adventures await!

There is nothing significant about this one spin of Earth – at least, no significance beyond that which we give it. The new year certainly has been and is celebrated at varied times. It is simply the idea of newness that pricks our spirit. The knowledge that one seed may fall, sprout, and take root toward new life is enough to keep us living life … one day at a time.

Psalm 121:8
The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in from this time forth, and even forevermore.

I may not know what lay ahead, but I know this story’s Author … and that is enough.

December 31, 2014

The Christmas We Were All Ill

We traveled to Indiana during the days surrounding Christmas. You may have heard that it was quite an adventure – it was! Simeon came down with a fever the evening before our departure. He went downhill quickly and began to take Aelah with him. After powering through a joyful gathering with my siblings at Lakeview, we spent 4 hours making our way through an urgent care clinic and skipping a family gathering. Simeon was diagnosed with an ear infection, conjunctivitis and congestion throughout his chest and head. Three days later on Christmas Eve, we took a family trip to the same urgent care and all came home with new/renewed antibiotic prescriptions. Sadly, we attended no worship services during the season. As we neared the end of the week and we were all still somewhat sick, we decided to skip out on a final family gathering and get ourselves home early.

Lord, wrest my heart from cares of this world, that I might rest in You.

December 15, 2014

Current Status

Hello, family, friends, and fellow workers. I wanted to write and give you an update on what has been occupying my time of late and what is on the horizon. In part, this is to inform you (esp. those whom might be directly affected by some of these upcoming projects – i.e. home office staff). In other part, this is to put things in order for myself as I work to efficiently tackle the workload and attempt to set most of it aside for the coming days and enjoy a holiday unhindered with stresses related to the work I do here in Minneapolis. So, what have I been up to of late and what awaits upon my return? Here’s a quick, non-comprehensive, and little detailed list.

December 8, 2014

Holiday Fellowship

We had a weekend full of fellowship and holiday happenings.

Friday

Adam, Pascal, Jenna, and I joined a small gathering of folks at Mary Bull’s home for a chili dinner and a time of worship in song. It’s been quite some time since we’ve had opportunity for that – such a wonderful time. And many thanks to Adrienne who would have loved to join, but manned the home front with the kids.

Saturday

We traveled to Krueger Christmas Tree Farm with Adam, Pascal, and Jenna and hunted down some of the cheapest trees we could find. It was a beautiful day for walking the fields! After returning home and enjoying a soup lunch, Hannah and the Lackey girls joined us for the making of Grittibänz and a couple games of Brändi Dog (very similar to Partners – for those who have played).

Sunday

Worship at Bethel on Sunday morning. I think it has been a few weeks since we’ve attended, so it was certainly nice to be there again. We did a bit of napping in the afternoon, decorated the tree, and set up the nativity. Aelah has been quite excited to care for baby Jesus. She says, “He has a belly button just like I have a belly button.” Unfortunately, he broke this morning. 🙁

Big girl, pulling the tree

The making of Grittibänz

Dominating Brändi Dog

Baby Jesus & Me

December 3, 2014

Withholding Explanation

Aelah is in an inquisitive prime these days. It seems that most any imperative or question from us evokes a probing, defiant, and persistent, “Why?” Most often I find myself trying to satiate her wonderings with reason and logic. Though probably healthy for her to some degree, I am also finding that this does not work all that well with a two-year old. I can’t seem to sufficiently explain why one must put their clothes in the hamper, or stop singing so loudly while brother sleeps, or not get to use the pink cup today. And so, I have also begun responding simply with, “Aelah, I’ve already answered that.”

Last night as I was settling the kids into their beds (i.e., cradling Simeon until he’s limp enough that I know he won’t wake when I lay him down and pleading with Aelah to remain in her bed, to lie down, and to close her eyes), Aelah began asking that question again. – “Why?” – It’s probably been said by many a parent, but I was surprised to hear myself finally say something to the effect of, “Daddy does not always have to explain himself.”

December 1, 2014

Thoughts on Time & Identity

He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also He has put eternity in their hearts, except that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.

Having recently lost all of our digital data from the past 20 years, I have been thinking now and then on the legacy we leave when our days on earth have expired. As unsettling as it was to lose so many memories (photos, videos, writings, and the like), I mentioned that there was also a strange freedom in it. You’ve probably experienced a similar thing when it comes to lightening your load. Whether it be shredding papers that have gathered on the corner table, taking that closet of clothes to the donation center, or any number of such things, you are able to breathe just a bit more freely afterwards.

In these past 20 years, I have maybe accessed those archived files only a handful of times. And, in doing so, there was usually only a very small number of files I revisited. I don’t know that I’ve looked at our wedding photos in the past five years we’ve been married. I’d certainly not re-read papers I’d written in college or accessed websites I’d developed at millennium’s end. (Okay, maybe I did view those once or twice just for fun.) And, as much as I might like to imagine my kids digging into a small block of digital information left behind by their parents in order to preserve some sort of legacy of our life, I must admit it’d probably never happen.

When we look back on generations past, it may be that we pull out a photo album and peruse a small collection of photos. It may be that we ascend to the attic and open an old trunk that houses the belongings of those who’ve passed on. It may even be that we sit around a table with a shoebox full of letters and re-live moments of their living. I see our children doing the same. With a handful of heirlooms or images and a headful of memories, we will be remembered. I would not wish upon my children a digital pile of holed away things I once thought important. Granted, we may someday have an optimized system for storing and accessing archives and it could even be as if they were speaking with me again. I just don’t see the value.

I recently stumbled upon a timeline of the far future. Intriguing.

I also happened upon the KEO project, an interesting endeavor authored by Jean-Marc Philippe to communicate with the inhabitants of earth 50,000 years hence. Up until the end of 2014, we can each submit a message that will be preserved in a space time capsule set to fall upon earth some day in the long distant future.

I realize that we have a desire to live on (even here on earth). I know the longing to feel as if we’ve made some small mark in history. And yet, it is not of us to know the times and the season our God has planned. It is of us to live faithfully this day … here … now. It is of us to claim the calling, to live His love, and to hope for a world made new with life eternal.

November 26, 2014

V Anniv.

All the way to Minneapolis.

With thanksgiving, here’s to five years of marriage … whether we are slinking away to Stillwater for a weekend getaway (while our kids are in the excellent care of our good friends Dave & Carly) where massages, a downtown walk, and a Victorian bed & breakfast await replete with breakfast in bed and other extremely comfy things – this happened this past weekend and it was wonderful! – or we are cleaning the kitchen floor for 1½ hours at midnight because a shelf in our refrigerator door decided to let loose and shatter glasses of cream, blueberries, and kambucha juice all about, even under the dishwasher, which then sprung a leak as I pulled it out just a bit too far – this happened last night and was not all that wonderful – God is faithful, the journey is grand, the joys are sublime, the sorrows still rich, and the years, may they stretch ahead full and far (much further and fuller than this sentence ever could).

November 20, 2014

#HymnAlong Mondays

Jesus As Lord Online

If you’ve spent any amount of time on social media, you will know that the experience could be likened to walking the streets of {insert densely populated Asian city here}. There is a sense of chaos among the intricately structured web. Personal bloggers and small organizations find difficulty even in connecting with those who have explicitly expressed a social interest in them. While much talk is had of providing value and of being present online, the medium itself often discourages this very thing. Rather than promoting significant and meaningful conversation, algorithms tend to direct users to content that might be commercially harnessed for someone else’s financial benefit (as evidenced by the Facebook post below). We are quickly and effectively being made into stuporous consumers of clickbait and trendy trivial novelties. That is, there is great opportunity for the church to mobilize and speak truth into the digital realm.

One Hour • Three Views

As manager of World Mission Prayer League‘s online presence, I have long wondered what benefit we might best provide to our fellowship of praying members and to those who have chosen to follow the mission online. What part have we to play in Kingdom work online and how are we to undertake this task? The answer has proved to be quite elusive.

With these challenges in mind and to the end of encouraging Christians everywhere in the global task of knowing Christ, praying for His kingdom come, and sharing truth with those who are too familiar with lies, we invite you to join us in online fellowship and Gospel proclamation. Our handbook states …

If Jesus our Lord is sovereign, we may expect to find him at work wherever and however he pleases. He is not bound by human formulations of spiritual and secular, heavenly and earthly, eternal and temporal, sacred and mundane, and the like. If Jesus is sovereign, he is Sovereign over all.

– Mission Handbook, ¶154

I am sometimes tempted to relegate online missionary service to second-tier status, but there is Gospel work to be done among the masses who congregate online day by day. If Jesus is sovereign, He is not bound by our formulations of off-line or online communication. We may find Him at work wherever and however He pleases.

Let Us Join Our Voices

Every Monday at 232 Clifton in Minneapolis, we gather for prayer. After listening to the story behind the writing of some specific hymn, we then sing it and reflect. And now, in an effort to mirror this habitual discipline adopted by our staff, we are taking this gathering online. You can now join us in revisiting, resurrecting, and reflecting on the rich text that is found in so many great hymns of old (and of late). We will periodically be posting a lyrical excerpt from the hymnody. Please, carry on the conversation with some form of reply. Here are a few ideas:

additional lyrics from the hymn
reflections on how the hymn may have found a home in your heart
thoughts on the theology in song
links to a favorite arrangement
personal words of prayer and praise
or, if you’re really feeling it, a photo or video response

It is our hope that together, in fellowship, we may be provoked to prayer and praise of the Triune God.

So come, #HymnAlong with us on Facebook, Twitter, or Google+.

#HymnAlong

November 19, 2014

Digital Disaster

These past couple weeks have been rough when it comes to the digital realm and me. If work didn’t demand it, I would probably not be on speaking terms with most of the devices in our home … maybe I’d go bury them in the snow.

I may have already mentioned my phone – for nearly two months or so, it has been on the fritz. Messages and phone conversations are often non-responsive until after a reboot. I think we’ll soon have those troubles under control.

And then there was this …

On the first of November, I decided it was time to retire an aging WD 120GB external hard drive that was at capacity, had served a good long life, and had just begun to show signs of dying. After purchasing a Seagate 2TB, which I partitioned for use with Time Machine and storage of select files, I attempted to migrate a small chunk of files. Following the transfer of three directories, the old drive failed and I have, as of yet, been unsuccessful in getting a machine to mount it. Quite sure we have lost the data of 20 years.

Thankfully, I had begun to store a small portion of what I considered to be valuable data on my MacBook. I’d already transferred personal songwriting notes and demo recordings of fleeting tunes. I also had the majority of our photos from since Aelah’s birth on my machine. And, of course, many files with which I work daily.

My MacBook has been through a lot over the past year that I’ve had it. It had begun to be a bit flaky with WiFi connectivity, didn’t seem to want to mount the new Seagate drive from time to time, and a number of other performance issues seemed like they might be remedied by a fresh start. So, Monday night, I decided to clean install Yosemite OS. I had run Time Machine and was quite certain I had backups on the Seagate drive.

Yesterday, I decided I’d manually restore files from the backups only to find that nothing was there. No thing. Not a single file had been backed up. Quite sure we have lost all (or nearly all).

Here’s a small log of all the digital data that has perished.

Photos & Videos (camp, YE teams, family, wedding, Aelah, Simeon, etc., etc.)
Songwriting (notes, projects, ideas, & demo recordings)
Writing (letters, blogs, emails, college papers, etc., etc. – thankfully, I had once ported the book I was once writing to a private post here at vandercar.net)
Projects (hours upon thousands of hours work from the numerous jobs I have held)
Web & Design (most all website & images I’ve ever designed, current WMPL projects)
Music (most all CDs I’ve ever burned)
Etc., etc., … and who knows what else.

Needless to say, I am super frustrated with myself (and maybe life, in general). I seem to be maintaining work computers and the office network decently well, but personally – no.

Last night I returned the Seagate drive and purchased a Toshiba replacement. I’m now in process of collecting remnants of our digital past, combing through folders on my work machine, our web host, Dropbox, Google Drive, and some social media accounts.

As you may know we recently moved into the mission home and are now residing in a smaller space than we previously were. We are trying to rid ourselves of physical stuff, as well. There is a freedom in that. This digital loss is but one more reminder of that which is truly important. As upsetting as it may be, there is a sense of freedom. Now to regroup and make a new digital way forward.

Have you ever experienced the loss of digital property? What did you learn while surveying the ashes?

November 15, 2014

Giving Voice. Lord, Pull Me Out.

Ah, my Lord. Life has kept me occupied these days. There is a longing within me … a deep well that thirsts for the filling. How is it that I have neglected Your grace, Your truth, and the comfort of Your words and the beauty of Your presence for such a long time. How is it that I have so long neglected speaking with you through the written word?

I have a family now. What blessing here You have given unto me. And yet, such great demand – such great responsibility. There is an intentionality that I must grasp in my spirituality these days. These earthly relationships, though of great import, will falter and fall far, if attention and energy is not given to You.

There is a sorrow and longing that has creeped into the space between You and me, between me and them. The empty spaces must be filled and so they will. Lord, let me again seek You out for the filling … and, more, for the ever abiding. Let me tread the barren land that has come upon this life. And, in those spaces, burn me again in Your refining gloriousness and raise me from the ashes. Daily death. Daily resurrection and life.

I must again give voice to these pleadings. That’s the place to start. God, grace me with wonder, hope, joy, and a vision of life budding anew … especially as winter descends. Amen.

November 14, 2014

Is This a Blog Post?

I think there is a misunderstanding among internet folk these days. It may be that even you are unwittingly mistaken.

Is this a blog post? A collection of thoughts from one man regarding a particular topic – a commentary or opinion on the current definition of what it means to blog online. In my estimation, I would not consider this a blog post. Sure, Wikipedia and some collective definition of the word ‘blog’ are sure to disagree with me.

To me, a blog is just that … a web log – a digital journal mapping my meanderings in life – a diary wrapped up in zeroes and ones. And yet, in most online social spheres, to say ‘blog’ would encompass any number of periodical publications on a site – archived resources, tutorial write-ups, critical reviews, opinion pieces, and the like. It would seem blogging has lost its logging.

Blogs

Not Blogs

The past few days have found me struggling to express my thoughts. With a desire to give words to the mess in my mind, I’ve lost battle after battle to the blank page before me. The distinction I make above is one that will, I hope, free me from the burden of writer’s blockage.

My intake of so-called ‘blog’ articles has been on the rise in recent weeks. I have found myself overloaded with information, ideas, tutorials, and the like. With this overload, has come an urgent sense that I must get out, stop … breathe. For some long time I have known that I must return to regular journaling. This has not happened. And now, as I sit to write, I find myself trying to capture thoughts and craft words that might be proffered to the never satiated masses of the interwebz.

And so now, I must again resolve to blog. To simply write. To let my thoughts pour forth from mind to page. To reclaim the wonder and comfort of the word. And, if I find this not working, then I must maybe take the ‘b’ out of blogging, find a pen and some paper and keep some log of life. It keeps me sane to some degree, I think.

So, this is where I’m at today. Thinking back, I’m quite certain I’d find countless journal entries that began, “It’s been a while …” Well, it’s been a while. I think it’s time to write. I think I’ll find myself using the Private status of WordPress posting quite more often now. And, I don’t know … I suppose I might consider this a blog post of some psuedo- sort, huh?

November 6, 2014

We've Moved (Again) & Other Assorted Happenings

Well … appears it has now been two months since we last wrote. We’ve been trudging through time, it seems. There have been a number of joys, but certainly no lack of stresses.

We’ve welcomed a few visitors. Ed & Cori routed themselves and Hodor through the Cities for a brief visit. Papa & Nana made a quick jaunt north for Simeon’s first birthday. Nana Steph surprised us by showing up with them.

Our good friends, Dave & Carly have returned from overseeing summer camp at Luther Dell and we’ve again begun our Thursday night gatherings for gaming, beer drinking, and good conversation.

We’ve moved! After Simeon tested high for lead at his nine month checkup, we determined that the Longfellow home was leaking lead and temporarily moved into the Philippines room of the Mission Home. After being there for a few weeks, we began wrestling with whether or not we should return or stay. A number of factors led us to the point of staying. Foremost was the relationships that could be nurtured by our being nearer the regular happenings of the WMPL community. We were able to have impromptu meals with others living in the Mission Home and Coach House. I was able to return home and join Adrienne and the kids for lunch each day. They were able to again attend morning prayer at the office. Also, Aelah would cry each time we tried to return to the Longfellow home. This clued us into the thought that she must really like being near so many people on a regular basis. A hint … there might be something to staying … and so we are. I could write more on this sometime.

It’s been a transition for sure. We made the move in small bits … a load now, a load later, and so on and on. We’ve finally moved everything (except the piano and Adrienne’s old art locker). And, in the midst of the move we’ve been trying to purge stuff. The joys of moving into a small space. We have yet to fully settle.

Adrienne helped coordinate and facilitate a refreshing of our church nursery. It’s looking great. Still a few loose ends to tie with that project.

Adrienne also began attending a Bible study on Tuesday mornings at a church nearby.

I continue to work on the website, developing tools to assist our workers in communicating their story to the fellowship. It is still so easy to get lost in the code at times, but I do pray that the tools we are developing today will prove to serve the mission well. There are still a few structures I’d like to put in place, but we have begun some implementation and training. Much more is yet needed. I also need to devote a good amount of time to documentation, so that those who would follow after me might easily pick up the tools and readily use them.

We’re also investigating the possibility of a new color copier/printer at the office. I’ve been involved in configuring it for use on our network and assessing how well it will serve our purposes. The jury is still out on this one. I think the need for such a machine is quite evident … whether it’s this specific one is yet to be known.

I, and a few of the other young guys at the office, have resurrected a ping-pong table that was long in storage and have been enjoying a game now and then.

Simeon has begun walking. We’re now working on night weaning and sleeping longer nights. Getting nearer to that end. He climbs. Oh, how he climbs!

You can almost always find Aelah telling stories. Her imagination is thriving. Such fun! She also enjoys singing her way through the day. Also a joy!

I’m sure I’m missing much, so I’ll just dump a load of photos here. Enjoy!

(Remember, you can click to enlarge and cycle through with the arrow keys)

Going for a ride

Donuts!

Sugar beard

Lake Hiawatha

Getting artsy

Going for another ride

Heroes & Capitols

Reflected running

My friend Amelia

Samurai

Ready for a trip to Loring

A closer look at the fountain

First trip to Costco

This is my foot

More Catan

Hanging in Hodor

Sky Pesher

Time with daddy

He loves doing this … all the time.

Hilpert house concert

Me & bonnet

Me & mixing bowl

The leaves are falling …

… and we love it!

Steph’s crown

Waiting on a wagon

Papa carries Aelah

Daddy carries Simeon

Corn crib slide

Tuckered out

New digs

Cruising

More cruising … in style

Exploring underside of couch

Ping-pong

Zion

Until next time … God keep you.

October 2, 2014

Lindell’s Utmost

The wonder and beauty of a bookshelf is that it houses such a great number of mysterious portals to worlds unknown and times not lived. This past weekend, while pacing the basement hall of the mission home in order to pacify Simeon, I glimpsed a title tucked away on a corner shelf – My Utmost for His Highest. This book has, for many years, awakened my spiritual senses, and challenged me to consider the state of my relationship with God and the way in which I carry out Kingdom service here on earth. As such, I was involuntarily drawn to pick the book from the shelf and give it a quick once over. Upon opening the cover, I was greeted with the signature of Paul Lindell – a missionary child from China who’s vision led him into service as a forefather of the World Mission Prayer League. I took a few photos of the book and determined to revisit a story recounted by Mildred Tengbong in The Spirit of God Was Moving. The year was 1939.

A special text for Paul Lindell

A turning point came at the end of his second year. … Paul was considering two possible courses of action. The one would be conventional: Complete seminary, be ordained and go to China as a missionary. The other would be highly unconventional: He had been asking himself why a mission society like the China Inland Mission could not come to birth in the Lutheran church. This would mean not only that new areas could be occupied, but also that more lay people could go. If this were to come to pass, and if he were to be a part of it, would it not be better for him to remain unordained and retain the status of a lay person? he reasoned. But what would his mother say about this? And the pastor father of his sweetheart from childhood, Margaret Sovik? And the mission board which had cared for their family so well all through the years?

All these questions Paul was asking himself as he struggled to understand God’s will for his life. He went to the dean of the seminary and unburdened his heart. The dean suggested he pray. So Paul took his Bible and a copy of Oswald Chambers’ book, My Utmost for His Highest, and shut himself in a small room on the top floor of the dormitory. In his own words Paul describes what took place:

For two days and nights it was a fight, a fight to the finish. I saw that I had to die, die to my ambitions, my fond hopes, my reputation, the kind opinions of my friends, my closest human ties, my possessions, my cherished traditions, my own willfulness. But it was a losing fight from the start. At last a simple line from Oswald Chambers brought the final word: “If you debate for a second when God has spoken, it is all up. Never begin to say, “Well, I wonder if He did speak?’ Be reckless immediately, fling it all out on Him. You do not know when his voice will come, but whenever the realization of God comes in the faintest way imaginable, recklessly abandon. It is only by abandon that you will recognize Him. You will only realize his voice more clearly by recklessness.”

I plunged, abandoned all to Him and took the path which He had indicated. In place of bondage and dissatisfaction I have found liberty and deepest rest. In losing my life I found it again, now greatly enriched with “unutterable and exalted joy.”

Two convictions came to Paul as the outcome of those decisive days: He was assured God was calling him to work with a mission society, and he felt he should not seek ordination, but instead identify himself with the laity.

Seventy-five years ago, Paul Lindell took his Bible and what may well have been this very book and wrestled with the call of God upon his life. As I hold this book, I am awestruck at the courage wielded by the men and women who forged a way forward for the mission of God among the lay people of the Lutheran church. I am grateful for the rich history that has been written among the Prayer League fellowship as a result those who have recklessly and obediently abandoned themselves to the call of God. And I am honored that we might be called fellow workers with God in His kingdom.

Over the coming months, I will be sharing the various passages highlighted by Paul Lindell. Posts will be tagged #LindellsUtmost. May you experience the wonder of God’s persistent work among His people and return Him thanks.

#LindellsUtmost